Gestation Myth

By : Icarus
Views : 453

Was it first in Mestre? Walking across the main piazza, whose blockhouse church is untypically squat and antipatico, for Italy.

Antonio my friend who knew everybody, pointed him out. He saved up his money year on year and no bella signorinas in between.

How strange I thought, as we passed the cinema, here of all places someone would choose elsewhere.

Not so. Probably it was Mark, who had tortured me with his voice and his madness years before. He dismembered roofs one summer long in London’s Westbourne Grove and took a plane, probably had a propeller. When he landed they were stacked up against the barriers blowing kisses, he said.

Then sometime in the early nineties we stopped over on the way to Bali and they brought the Bangkok Post aboard.

I read with trembling hands.

 

© Icarus. All rights reserved by the author.


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Comments / Feedback

Dana
June 1, 2007, 12:36

I'd like to see the word 'barriers' replaced but is a small thing . . .

Better!

Might be fun to do one of these stories where the narrator speaks in this Icarusian way and one of the interior characters in the story speaks in a completely opposite way: wordy, dense, crude, verbal diahrrea that runs on and bludgeons the reader with too much of everything: do a juxtoposition of styles piece. Just ramblin'.
chuckwoww
June 2, 2007, 07:21

Another piece of the puzzle. Icarus reflects on getting bitten by the Bangkok bug. Yes Dana....'barriers' is a little ponderous...hard to think of a replacement though.
Marc Holt
June 2, 2007, 12:04

So Dana, are you proposing a collaboration with icarus? Sounds like the Laurel and Hardy of writers.

Actually, Icarus used the word 'barriers' well. Back in the days of propellor aircraft, the airports really did have barriers to keep the greeters off the tarmac. But you, Dana, are much too young to remember all the way back then, n'est pas?
Dana
June 2, 2007, 15:28

I suspected and agree that technically 'barriers' is correct but it just did not work 100% for my ear or word picture. I am going to have to come up to Icarus's level: I just hope we do not fly too high and have the sun melt the wax on our wings (couldn't resist). I'll follow him obediantly until we slip the surly bonds of prose and . . . wait a minute; there are limits--if he ever gets as obtuse as New Yorker magazine poems I'm done. I'm on the way to Godhead status but even gods have limits--haven't understood one of those poems ever.
Geoff
June 3, 2007, 04:33

Like before, I have no problems with it other than, now, after reading the setup, I want the story. Or, are these building as parts of a whole, like a serial?

I really enjoy, however, watching the 'barrier' discussion. Be careful though, Gentlemen, if you keep bickering like Tom and Ezra about perfect word placement, you will lose your hard-won reputations as soul-less hedonists and start being looked at as poet-scholars...
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