Terror at 30,000 Feet

By : Steve Rosse
Views : 417

They were flying over Alaska, and even with the shades pulled down over most of the windows the first class cabin of light TG461 was filled with an eerie, brilliant white light. In seat 3-C Scott's biological clock said that it was two-o'clock in the morning, but the searing light and the unceasing chatter of the Thai businessman in seat 3-D prevented any chance of sleep.

"It's really a sort of celebration, rather than just a business trip," said seat 3-D. He put one hand on Scott's thigh, which made the American flinch, and whispered into his ear, "If it was just a business trip I'd have brought my secretary, instead of my wife." He giggled and winked and twitched his head in the direction of the matronly Thai woman sleeping in seat 3-E across the aisle.

Scott kept his gaze on the back of seat 2-C in front of him. He tried to signal the stewardess and order a drink, not because he wanted a drink, but because it would give him a break from the maddening prattle coming from 3-D. "I'm celebrating the signing of a new contract for my company. We closed the deal last Tuesday in Bangkok, and I'm going to Los Angeles to sign the papers with our American partners. It's a big contract, I can tell you, worth," he paused between each word for emphasis, "seventy, million, US, dollars."

Seat 3-D waited for a reaction from Scott, but Scott had his head out in the aisle, trying to find a stewardess.

Seat 3-D assumed that Scott was still listening and continued. "It's a theme park. You know, like Disneyland or Cape Kennedy. Well, it's really a housing development, but these days there is so much development in Thailand you need a hook, a gimmick. So what we've done is surround a water slide and a roller coaster with 200 condos and called it a theme park. You buy a condo, you get to ride on all the rides for free. And there's golf, too, of course. Nine holes."

Seat 3-D was not looking at Scott any more. In fact his gaze was set in the mid-distance, focused on nothing inside the plane. "This is the big one," he said, more to himself than to Scott. "This is the one I've worked for my whole life. The rest of them got theirs in the 80s and 90s. I was beginning to think I was too old, that I'd be stuck building gas stations and strip malls forever. But this is the one. Seventy million dollars. I guess that must seem like an awful lot of money to a young man like you."

Seat 3-D looked at seat 3-C, and was very surprised to find it empty. Scott had fled to the men's room, where he was sitting on the toilet pressing the palms of his hands into his eye sockets. When he opened his eyes again the bathroom was filled with a galaxy of exploding stars and comets. The show lasted a few seconds and then Scott took out his cell phone and punched one button. There was a rapid beeping, a short pause, and on the other end of the line the phone was picked up after the first ring.

"Schwartz," said a groggy voice.

"Keith. Scott."

"Yo, Dog, 'sup? Where are you?"

"In the toilet on a jumbo jet. I haven't slept in 48 hours and I got a meeting with Hal in Development four hours after I'm wheels down at LAX."

"Wow, Dude. Terror at 30,000 feet. So what can I do for you, Babe?"

"Listen, I want you to call Vicki and tell her to close down the Bangkok production office. We're gonna shoot this turkey in the Philippines after all."

"But Scottie, Baby, Buhbie, that will put us another two weeks behind schedule. You know that we lose Keanu in August, he's doing Iago at the Utah Shakespeare Festival, and Julia's agent says that if we stall her again she'll binge and put on 10 pounds. And you gotta know Bobby's gonna be really pissed off."

"Screw Bobby. He only wanted to go to Thailand to shoot the picture 'cuz he met a girl there on "Casualties of War". Tell him the studio's not spending seventy million dollars on his lame script just so he can have a reunion with an old girlfriend."

"Okay, okay, chill man. What made you change your mind, anyway?"

"I don't know. There's just something about that place. Like, I sent my driver out for Xanax and he comes back with Valium and a big, dopey grin on his face. Like Valium and a smile is going to do what ten years of therapy couldn't, right?"

"You sound way stressed, Dude."

"Yeah, Thailand is no place to relax."

"Why don't you come out to the Malibu house this weekend? Lazlo is casting for Roger Corman and it's gonna be wall-to-wall honeys. Weather report says there's a big snow storm coming up from Peru. Whattayasay, Dude? There's no place like home, Auntie Em."

"Roger that, Maverick."

"Sometimes the magic works."

"It's a dick thing."

"You da man."

"No, you da man."

Scott closed his phone and put it back in his pocket. He stood up and looked at himself in the mirror over the sink. He had deep black circles under his eyes and his skin looked green. He was only 28 years old, but he looked far older. He thought that he couldn't face the cabin full of light and the businessman in seat 3-D, so he sat down on the toilet again. He leaned his head back against the wall and close his eyes.

In his mind Scott put himself in a happy place. The studio didn't have the phone number at the Malibu house. There was a girl named Kandi sitting on his lap. A week ago Kandi was graduating from high school somewhere in Idaho, but she'd always wanted to be a movie star, so now she was sitting on his lap wearing Ray-Bans and cross-trainers and nothing else. Somewhere over Canada Scott finally fell asleep, and he slept in the bathroom all the way to LA.

 

© Steve Rosse. All rights reserved by the author.

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If you liked this short story by Steve Rosse you can read more of his work by purchasing his books, 'Thai Vignettes' and 'Expat Days' online at BangkokBooks.com. Here's the direct links to each for easy purchase.

Thai Vignettes: http://www.bangkokbooks.com/php/product/product.php?product_id=000025&sub_cate_name=&sub_cate_id=

Expat Days: http://www.bangkokbooks.com/php/product/product.php?product_id=000032&sub_cate_name=&sub_cate_id=


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Rating

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Comments / Feedback

chuck
April 28, 2008, 02:10

I'm not sure where the author is going with this but it shows the way forward I think. If the 'Bangkok novel' is ever going to evolve beyond the limits of the sexpat niche market there need to be some external elements.
Dana
April 28, 2008, 08:42

Attn: Mr. Chuck

"If the 'Bangkok novel' is ever going to evolve beyond the limits of the sexpat niche market there need to be some external elements."

I could not agree more. How about this for an 'external element'? The main character's plane is crashed into by a plane full of sexy naked Go Go dancers on holiday from their farang husbands. The air over Alaska is full of falling pinwheeling screaming naked Go Go dancers. And when they hit the ground they . . . . ok, I don't know what happens when they hit the ground: but I do know they are naked sexy Go Go dancers.

I could not agree more
Marc Holt
April 28, 2008, 09:11

That's it? What's the story?
steve rosse
April 29, 2008, 01:43

Well, the way forward or the way back. In the old days, before anybody with a word processor could get published, books like "Mai Pen Rai Means Nevermind", "The Ugly American" and even "Mrs. Pollifax in the Golden Triangle" aspired to literature in the Kingdom without beating the dead horse of commercial sex. Even Anna Leon Owens did not write about hookers. "Bangkok Editor" by Alex McDonald does not contain any sex scenes. And the classic, never-equalled "A Woman of Bangkok" was a fantastic first novel despite its theme, not because of it. It's only in the last 10 years or so, with the success of Bangkok Book House, that we've seen "I knew a bargirl once who..." put on a par with "Call me Ishmael."
steve rosse
April 29, 2008, 19:32

That's it? What's the story?

That's all the story I could fit into 1,000 words, Marc. That's how much room The Nation gave me every Sunday and I did the best I could with the space provided.
Sean Bunzick
April 29, 2008, 20:51

I think Steve Rosse brought up a good point about novels about Thailand that are about matters other than commercial sex but it's not at all as though books like that don't exist nowadays!
Dean Barrett and I were discussing this yesterday and we both came to the conclusion that while our books do have scenes in red-light districts, those worlds aren't the core of the storyline itself. Granted, my latest novel "Genuine Thai Copies" is about bargirls but in a very unique way (one bargirl is cloned and the clones are nothing like her). Also, my John Harwich Adventure series is primarily just that: action and adventure in Thailand and other parts of Southeast Asia. Sure, I have a main character with a bar on Patpong but Sex-For-Sale isn't what my books are about. It's lost treasure, gangsters, opium warlords, terrorists, Chinese junks and a mad car race from Saigon to Bangkok. Is there sex in these books? Of course there is but again, boom-boom with a bargirl is not what my novels concentrate on.
Nor am I alone.
Jason Schoonover gives even better action/adventure in Southeast Asia than I do.
Chris Moore's Vinnie Calvino visits the bars but as a detective looking into all phases of Thai culture, not just a farang looking to get P4P.
Stephen Leather gives you thrillers that make you think.
Dean Barrett takes you to Thailand--and Vietnam, Hong Kong, China--and makes you laugh even as he shows you the way these worlds operate.
Jake Needham gives you intellectuall thrillers as well.
And there are lots of other authors out there giving you this part of the world in a similar manner.
Put down the beer mug, leave Nana, hit the bookstores and you'll soon see what I mean.
The reason most of us published authors don't put too much into these chats is that we're too busy writing novels. Point in fact, I've got one to return to right now. Cheers!
chuckwoww
April 30, 2008, 00:08

"The air over Alaska is full of falling pinwheeling screaming naked Go Go dancers. And when they hit the ground they . . . ."
....land in a lost world, part Pattaya, part Jurassic Park, where they learn to survive by hunting wooly mammoths....
Dana
April 30, 2008, 05:40

"The air over Alaska is full of falling pinwheeling screaming naked Go Go dancers. And when they hit the ground they . . . ."

"....land in a lost world, part Pattaya, part Jurassic Park, where they learn to survive by hunting wooly mammoths...."

Exactamundo (that's Spanish) Mr. Woww (if that is your real name); and I think your clever plot device shows just how easy it is to write these novels. Personally, the reason I do not have time to write those novels is that I am too much into these chat sites.

Additionally, our friend Mr. Rosse with his quote:

"It's only in the last 10 years or so, with the success of Bangkok Book House, that we've seen "I knew a bargirl once who..." put on a par with "Call me Ishmael."

has with the unerring snuffling of a blind truffle hunting French (fxxx the French) pig hit upon the next novel type and perhaps the backbone and skeleton of the GEN (Great Expat Novel).

To wit: a combination novel that combines Melville's Moby Dick and Thai bargirls. I, Dana, will be the Ishmael of the novel hunting for the great white skinned evil bargirl that cut off my leg in the past when she was so drunk she thought my penis was my leg (easy mistake to make). Etc.

Hey, how do I think of these things? Genius, and Mr. Rosse. Thank-you Mr. Rosse for coming up with an idea for a Thai-farang novel so absurd that it will finally drive a stake into the genre from which it won't survive. Then we can all relax and get back to being wide eyed tourists in the strange worlds of women and Thailand.


Jago Turner
April 30, 2008, 16:59

Okay. This is more a response to the responses than to the story. This story is a small slice of life piece which does touch, interestingly, on a truism but feels like it belongs in a wider story that the reader is not privvy to.

We are drifting, once more, into a discussion of whether or not it is valid to write about prostitution in Thailand. On one side there is the implication that if you write stories where prostitution is the core subject you are copping out and falling into a kind of laziness. On the other side there is a suggestion that the sexual beat of Thailand is the principle reason most people are interested in the country in the first place.

The truth is that in world terms Thailand is not at the cutting edge for western readers. It doesn't impact much on the average westerner's life. It isn't America, it isn't the New Europe, it isn't the Middle East. Those of us who write about Thailand do so because we have a special interest. We love the place. We are fascinated by its people and its culture. But if we're not selling to the localised tourist market or on a website like this we know that our love for Thailand is a matter of complete indifference to the people in our own countries. If they are going to read about Thailand they need exceptional cause. Stephen Leather gives them exceptional cause by writing fast moving gritty thrillers involving Vietnam, drugs and prostitution as part of the Bangkok backdrop. That's why he's one of the few authors to use Thailand as a setting and come up with bestsellers. Alex Garland honed in on the whole traveller scene and wrote a scathing book about the type of young people searching for their own unique experience and how bogus that is and created a bestselling phenomenon. John Burdett had some real success by setting his thrillers firmly in the nightlife scene. On the whole Bangkok and Thailand is primarily famous in the western world as a place with a lot of prostitutes and this is what people want to read about. We may know that the place is vastly more than those go go bars but if we're selling to the folks back home this is the USP.

Writing the types of personal stories about prostitution you find on this site may not be the wisest of moves for a would be novelist. You will inevitably hit the roadblock of political correctness. But a quick look at the thriving trade in movies and documentaries claiming to be about how awful prostitution is while thriving on the fascination the subject awakens and making a nice living from illicit camcorder shots in go go bars shows that this is still where the main action is.

Genre fiction sells because the audience knows that if all else fails there will be some kind of thrill. This is why Agatha Christie, Harold Robbins and Stephen King fared so much better in bestseller lists than even the most controversial literary figures like Salman Rushdie. Any interest in high literature, for me, was founded upon great writer like Zola, Dostoievsky or Maupassant writing on subjects like murder, horror or vice.

I do completely appreciate the point where people who love Thailand get sick of the one note interpretation of the place. It is a great country with a fascinating history and culture and if you have a Thai wife/girlfriend it can be a pain in the ass if everyone thinks that you bought her but if you're trying to stimulate readers I don't think it's wrong to start with the issue that got them reading about the country in the first place. It won't go down well with the editors of The Nation or even The Bangkok Post in these post Trink days and if you're one of those who can hit the bars any night of the week the whole subject may seem tawdry but for most of the people who hit on websites the subject is what makes us tune in in the first place.
chuckwoww
April 30, 2008, 20:07

"...a combination novel that combines Melville's Moby Dick and Thai bargirls."
That sounds promising Dana ....be sure to throw in a few semi-retired CIA agents caught in a web of intrigue with unscrupulous drug-running Burmese warlords and you could have the GEN we're all waiting for.
Dana
May 1, 2008, 06:13

Attn: Mr. Woww (as if)

". . . Melville's Moby Dick and Thai bargirls."

Just call it serendipitous genius: you will notice that I have the words 'dick' and 'bargirls' in the same sentence.

I'm not like others. Genius. Maybe an editor would shorten it to 'Melville's Dick and Thai bargirls.' Personally, I have never seen a dick with a moby condition.
Marc Holt
May 1, 2008, 10:11

Jago, your comments are as well thought out and on target as any of your stories. Have you ever written a novel? Now, that would be something worth reading.

Dana aspires to the GEN, but that is a tough tree to climb if it is only about the ludicrous side of the sex dream. Dana can take an idea and stretch it to absurd lengths, a rare talent. But will it make great literature? Hmmm.



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