Sexpats - what's that all about?

Having had a pop at Backpackers, in a previous article, it seems only fair that I should extend my objective anthropological research towards the other end of the spectrum of immigrants / holiday makers who find themselves stepping foot as a guest within the wonderful kingdom of Thailand. My next study is that strange breed of personage that is living here, more or less, purely for the ability to tap into the resource of female companionship, the ability, to be blunt, of co in-inhabitation with a younger, attractive member of the opposite sex. This subject, exerciser of debauched practices is often a male homo sap with a little money and a wealth of hope. This is what we in the trade like to call a; sexpat.

Okay; how do we spot a sexpat in the field:

1. Tattoos are often on show outside sleevless T-shirts with motifs like ‘Singha Beer’ or ‘Amazing Thailand’.
2. A bottle or glass of a cheap local beer; Leo, Chang, Singha, glued to the hand.
3. An amazing ability to talk about the current visa situation within the Thai kingdom.
4. Baldness.
5. A Thai girlfriend about forty years their junior.
6. A self conceived concept of understanding basic Thai language. In reality their Thai language is very bad. 
7. An ex-wife and children, who have given up on child support payments, in the ex-pats country of origin. A trail of debt and disappointment.
8. Credit card bills that will never be paid. Also, these bills are from the country of  the sexpat's origin. Probable court cases pending.
9. A steady supply of  ‘everhard’ drugs.
10. Encycoplidic knowledge of football. (soccer)

Now, I know that many readers here will fall into one of the categories mentioned above. I know that I, myself, probably fit into more than one of these categories. This is not a bad thing. I would rather be a sexpat than a backpacker. Sexpats in general have arrived from hard backgrounds in their formal countries and just want to have one more throw of the dice in a new and exotic land. And let’s not think that it is just men that are in on the deal. There are a few female sexpats on the scene too.

Let’s try and examine why a sexpat becomes a sexpat.

I once heard someone say that society punishes those that deviate from its norms. I do not quite know how you can define the punishment he was talking about, but I think what he was getting at was the physiological pressures put upon himself in an environment where one is expected to perform beyond his needs or indeed his wants. That is to say the pressures of modern day Western living had him held in a kind of sociological headlock. He, as a man, had come to a situation where his being a man has been called into question. He is living in an age where his disability to negotiate a number of techniques, although concern him on a fundamental level, are not necessary for his well being. Why should these so called pressures bother him? He is getting out of the rat race, he is not happy with the nuclear family in the States. None of it makes him happy: The big house, the mortgage, the office, the wife. He is happy in a dark musky room in a hotel in Sukumvit, Bangkok. The things of his past become nothings, bits, pieces that should have no control over him. And thus he is free.

This observation struck me, as many things do, in a bar in a tourist area of the kingdom of Thailand. For many males struggling with the pressures of the west, Thailand is the best bet, and in some cases the only option of finding some kind of meaning out of it all. The Sexpat is born.

The layman (or indeed laywoman) amongst you would obviously put this down to the apparent availability of nubile young women happy to co-inhabit with an over weight elder gentleman with more money than sense. They would be correct at first glance because of course this is an attraction. However, it is no more of an attraction than that of the bronzed Greek Adonis to the middle aged female European sex tourist traveling to Crete. Or the lure of the Jamaican stallion to the obese American executive in her travels to the Caribbean. People go on holiday and have sex. People, both male and female go abroad and have sex with strangers and pay for the privilege. The difference with Thailand is that people travel here and they do not want to go home. Male or female and of all ages, they all want a piece of it.

I dislike it when people talk about Thailand without having ever set foot in the country. They talk about prostitutes and lady boys as if it’s the funniest thing in the world. They laugh at their own jokes. I don’t quite know why it annoys me and I know it shouldn’t but there is so much more to the country than all these stereotypes. There are more prostitutes per capita in the United States of America and probably more Gays in Australia. Spend a bit of time in the kingdom and transsexuals become the norm. When a transsexual is normality, the majority of us would find it difficult to be “punished for not conforming to norm”. Thailand means land of the free, and barring immigration laws, violence, and the zero tolerance on drug abuse this still seems to be pretty much the case.

I rest my case. Let the sexpats stay.

Why?

Because I enjoy their company.

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