Dreams Last Forever, or Not?

After 3 weeks working in China I needed a rest and decided to use my stop-over in Bangkok to go to a quiet beach somewhere at the gulf of Siam. I took off with the bus from "Mo chit" bus terminal and after almost 3 hours in the bus I ended up at the most lovely and small beach I had ever seen. This must be paradise! I checked in at my wooden beach cabin and while resting for a moment on my bed I could hear the sea. I walked to the small restaurant of the hotel and enjoyed the wonderful food and friendly people here. It became exactly the kind of week that I needed, every day fresh fish, coconut, and a jump straight from my bed into the warm sea. I think I could stay here forever.

Just like Nok and Steven, the proud owners of this little paradise, who had met each other in a bar in Bangkok. He had money and a dream of living in a little paradise by the sea. She wanted a house with birds and flowers … and money. Here at this beautiful place on the beach they worked for four years to achieve their goal. Now there are five little bamboo houses with shower and toilet, and a restaurant with a bar. They just have to pick the coconuts out of the trees and ask 40thb each for them. Nok is farming her orchids and is always surrounded by singing birds. On one of the mornings at breakfast Nok started to talk to me "I don't love him one little bit", she complains to me, and, "He does not want to work anymore. He is drinking beer all day." Steven is a very skinny man and does not look very healthy. "Heroin and aids" are gossips from the other guests. Every morning when I wake up at seven o'clock I see him sitting at the restaurant behind his table, with a beer and a cigarette. His friends, mostly other local expats, drink with him.

Nok keeps quiet; after all, he bought the land, something of which he reminds her every day. If she leaves she will lose everything, and she will have to return to her bar in Bangkok. And Steven? He can check out, but he can never leave. After all, this is his dream. Luckily for me I do not have to stay here forever … I have a return ticket back home.

When I sit in my taxi and look backwards to see this little paradise fading away I think to myself, "Really, only the name of the hotel was wrong."

-Chang Noi-

p.s. All names have been changed.